Getting a rejection for a job you were excited about can feel defeating, but it doesn’t have to be all bad. Using this time to reach out and get feedback can be a valuable way to keep moving forward.

First, acknowledge that you aren’t a bad person, or worthless, or stupid. Sometimes an employer was looking for something you couldn’t offer. Sometimes you were a great candidate, and someone else just edged you out. And sometimes, the employer didn’t know what they were looking for in the first place. Your resume might have been filtered out before a person even got a chance to read it. None of that is your fault.

When you do receive a rejection, it’s always appropriate to request feedback. You might never hear back from the employer, but they might be willing to share some insight into why your application was rejected. Send a brief, polite email that thanks them for their time and consideration and then add:

“Would you be willing to share any feedback with me on your decision making process and what I might improve upon in the future?”

If you get a response, take the criticism at face value (assume they are telling you the truth). They may point out that it wasn’t clear how your experiences would make you a good fit for the role, in which case you should customize your resume to match the job description more carefully in the future. They may have felt that you were under- or too-qualified for the role, in which case you may think about how you are presenting your level of experience (and know that it's okay to apply for roles that you aren’t 100% qualified for). There may have been a typo or something irrelevant on your resume, in which case you’ll need to fix that before applying next time.

In any case, be coachable. Be willing to adjust your job search strategy and take any feedback you receive to heart. Know that employers can be bad at hiring and may give you confusing or misleading information, or they may make hiring decisions based on bad data or biases. You’re still a professional worthy of a good job. Adjust where you can, continue customizing your resumes, and you’ll eventually get to the interview.